Thursday, December 20, 2012
Wenches will be more cloying in their desire to be domesticated and chairs shall become slightly more uncomfortable as the date of our destruction nears.
The world shall burn, an incessant hellish buzzing as all Man shall live within the collective rectum of a dread legion of locusts with the faces of men and the wings of demons.
Mushroom clouds and black shrouds will greet the unholy pilgrims and saints of sin as the earth beneath us liquefies into a tentacled mass consuming unspoiled milk and rectifying all but the unresurrected.
Feast becomes famine as the children feed an army of false prophets and liars into the whirlpool of fire, thorns and briars will purify the tainted, damned and the dire.
A rambling chaos in which legs become arms and our souls are farmed, chicken nuggets and gizzards will be harvested as geese become lizards.
Watery low alcohol swill and gray tasteless cheese will placate the masses as Satan and his minions claim Dominion over a prized dimensional domicile of abandoned Pizza Huts, fruit cups and yeasty sluts.
Goatees and masturbation fees will become mandatory as crutons found in futons feed a multicultural bureaucracy which will be tasked in auditing our respective karmic depreciation. This will be supervised by the nefarious three-headed goat which shall determine whether a straight-line or accelerated method is preferable.